Funny Ass Chat Logs

[Vanity]

bloodninja: Ok baby, we got to hurry, I don't know how long I can keep it ready for you.
j_gurli3: thats ok. ok i'm a japanese schoolgirl, what r u.
bloodninja: A Rhinocerus. Well, hung like one, thats for sure.
j_gurli3: haha, ok lets go.
j_gurli3: i put my hand through ur hair, and kiss u on the neck.
bloodninja: I stomp the ground, and snort, to alert you that you are in my breeding territory.
j_gurli3: haha, ok, u know that turns me on.
j_gurli3: i start unbuttoning ur shirt.
bloodninja: Rhinoceruses don't wear shirts.
j_gurli3: No, ur not really a Rhinocerus silly, it's just part of the game.
bloodninja: Rhinoceruses don't play games. They fucking charge your ass.
j_gurli3: stop, cmon be serious.
bloodninja: It doesn't get any more serious than a Rhinocerus about to charge your ass.
bloodninja: I stomp my feet, the dust stirs around my tough skinned feet.
j_gurli3: thats it.
bloodninja: Nostrils flaring, I lower my head. My horn, like some phallic symbol of my potent virility, is the last thing you see as skulls collide and mine remains the victor. You are now a bloody red ragdoll suspended in the air on my mighty horn.
bloodninja: Goddam am I hard now.

_________________________________
bloodninja: Baby, I been havin a tough night so treat me nice aight?
BritneySpears14: Aight.
bloodninja: Slip out of those pants baby, yeah.
BritneySpears14: I slip out of my pants, just for you, bloodninja.
bloodninja: Oh yeah, aight. Aight, I put on my robe and wizard hat.
BritneySpears14: Oh, I like to play dress up.
bloodninja: Me too baby.
BritneySpears14: I kiss you softly on your chest.
bloodninja: I cast Lvl. 3 Eroticism. You turn into a real beautiful woman.
BritneySpears14: Hey...
bloodninja: I meditate to regain my mana, before casting Lvl. 8 Cock of the Infinite.
BritneySpears14: Funny I still don't see it.
bloodninja: I spend my mana reserves to cast Mighty Fuck of the Beyondness.
BritneySpears14: You are the worst cyber partner ever. This is ridiculous.
bloodninja: Don't fuck with me bitch, I'm the mightiest sorcerer of the lands.
bloodninja: I steal yo soul and cast Lightning Lvl. 1,000,000 Your body explodes into a fine bloody mist, because you are only a Lvl. 2 Druid.
BritneySpears14: Don't ever message me again you piece of shit.
bloodninja: Robots are trying to drill my brain but my lightning shield inflicts DOA attack, leaving the robots as flaming piles of metal.
bloodninja: King Arthur congratulates me for destroying Dr. Robotnik's evil army of Robot Socialist Republics. The cold war ends. Reagan steals my accomplishments and makes like it was cause of him.
bloodninja: You still there baby? I think it's getting hard now.
bloodninja: Baby?
____________________
BritneySpears14: Ok, are you ready?
eminemBNJA: Aight, yeah I'm ready.
BritneySpears14: I like your music Em... Tee hee.
eminemBNJA: huh huh, yeah, I make it for the ladies.
BritneySpears14: Mmm, we like it a lot. Let me show you.
BritneySpears14: I take off your pants, slowly, and massage your muscular physique.
eminemBNJA: Oh I like that Baby. I put on my robe and wizard hat.
BritneySpears14: What the fuck, I told you not to message me again.
eminemBNJA: Oh shit
BritneySpears14: I swear if you do it one more time I'm gonna report your ISP and say you were sending me kiddie porn you fuck up.
eminemBNJA: Oh shit
eminemBNJA: damn I gotta write down your names or something
_________________________
bloodninja: Wanna cyber?
Katie_007: Sure, you into vegetables?
bloodninja: What like gardening an shit?
Katie_007: Yeah, something like that.
bloodninja: Nothing turns me on more, check this out:
bloodninja: You bend over to harvest your radishes.
(pause)
Katie_007: is that it?
bloodninja: You water your tomato patch.
bloodninja: Are you ready for my fresh produce?
Katie_007: I was thinking of like, sexual acts INVOLVING vegetables... Can you make it a little more sexy for me?
(pause)
bloodninja: I touch you on your lettuce, you massage my spinach... sexily.
bloodninja: I ride your buttocks like they were amber waves of grains.
Katie_007: Grain doesn't really turn me on... I was thinking more along the lines of carrots and zucchinis.
bloodninja: my zucchinis carresses your carrots.
bloodninja: Damn baby you're right, this shit is HOTT.
Katie_007: ...
bloodninja: My turnips listen for the soft cry of your love. My insides turn to celery as I unleash my warm and sticky cauliflower of love.
Katie_007: What the fuck is this madlibs? I'm outta here.
bloodninja: Yeah, well I already unleashed my cauliflower, all over your olives, and up in your eyes. Now you can't see. Bitch.
Katie_007: whatever.
____________________
bloodninja: Wanna cyber?
DirtyKate: OK, but don't tell anybody ;-)
DirtyKate: Who are you?
bloodninja: I've got blond hair, blue eyes, I work out a lot
bloodninja: And I have a part time job delivering for Papa John's in my Geo Storm.
DirtyKate: You sound sexy.. I bet you want me in the back of your car..
bloodninja: Maybe some other time. You should call up Papa John's and make an order
DirtyKate: Haha! OK
DirtyKate: Hello! I'd like an extra-EXTRA large pizza just dripping with sauce.
bloodninja: Well, first they would say, "Hello, this is Papa John's, how may I help you", then they tell you the specials, and then you would make your order. So that's an X-Large. What toppings do you want?
DirtyKate: I want everything, baby!
bloodninja: Is this a delivery?
DirtyKate: Umm...Yes
DirtyKate: So you're bringing the pizza to my house now? Cause I'm home alone... and I think I'll take a shower...
bloodninja: Good. It will take about fifteen minutes to cook, and then I'll drive to your house.
**pause**
DirtyKate: I'm almost finished with my shower... Hurry up!
bloodninja: You can't hurry good pizza.
bloodninja: I'm on my way now though
**pause**
DirtyKate: So you're at my front door now.
bloodninja: How did you know?
bloodninja: I knock but you can't hear me cause you're in the shower. So I let myself in, and walk inside. I put the pizza down on your coffee table.
bloodninja: Are you ready to get nasty, baby? I'm as hot as a pizza oven
DirtyKate: Oooohh yeah. I step out of the shower and I'm all wet and cold. Warm me up baby
bloodninja: So you're still in the bathroom?
DirtyKate: Yeah, I'm wrapping a towel around myself.
bloodninja: I can no longer resist the pizza. I open the box and unzip my pants with my other hand. As I penetrate the gooey cheese, I moan in ecstacy. The mushrooms and Italian sausage are rough, but the sauce is deliciously soothing. I blow my load in seconds. As you leave the bathroom, I exit through the front door....
DirtyKate: What the fuck?
DirtyKate: You perverted piece of shit
DirtyKate: Fuck


Stole this from wherever rsbot stole them from..I'll try my own later

[Nachos]

lol!!! nice one vanity :)

[Vanity]

Originally Posted by Hate

lol!!! nice one vanity :)

i r stoled this lol its not me

[Nachos]

my chat logs of doing it, im banana cream pie lol


<Paydro91> i slowly wakl in ur bathroom
<Paydro91> and open the door
<Banana_Cream_Pie> and im all wet
<Paydro91> i then open the curtain and hold ur mouth shut with mu hands
<Banana_Cream_Pie> and i cry a tear of joy\
<Paydro91> and drag you to ur room
<Banana_Cream_Pie> and i take it well
<Paydro91> theN I throw u on ur bed
<Banana_Cream_Pie> and i moan
<Banana_Cream_Pie> and then you take off my shower robes
<Paydro91> and i get on top of you placing ur hands under you so u can't
move
<Banana_Cream_Pie> and you feel my dick go in your ass
<Banana_Cream_Pie> baby you hre?
<Paydro91> then i pull it off
<Banana_Cream_Pie> ow!!!!
<Banana_Cream_Pie> fuck you!
<Banana_Cream_Pie> that fucking hrut!
<Paydro91> strangle u with my tenticles
<Banana_Cream_Pie> gosh damnit!
<Banana_Cream_Pie> you fucking suck!!
<Paydro91> then i smash ur face into your bed post
<Banana_Cream_Pie> damnit my crotch hurts like fuck!
<Paydro91> i yank ur teeth out with a wrench
<Banana_Cream_Pie> gosh damnit!
<Banana_Cream_Pie> you suck at this!
<Banana_Cream_Pie> and my dick you pulled off is a nuclear bomb
<Banana_Cream_Pie> 3
<Paydro91> no im kinda like a dentist
<Banana_Cream_Pie> 2
<Banana_Cream_Pie> 1
<Banana_Cream_Pie> boom!
<Banana_Cream_Pie> we all dead
<Banana_Cream_Pie> and my dick still saves my life
<Banana_Cream_Pie> bitch your dead from my nuclear bomb dick



<PaRaMoRe> hi
<Banana_Cream_Pie> hi
<PaRaMoRe> asl
<Banana_Cream_Pie> 15/f/usa
<PaRaMoRe> cool
<PaRaMoRe> what state
<Banana_Cream_Pie> ohio
<PaRaMoRe> so wuts up?
<Banana_Cream_Pie> nothing
<PaRaMoRe> what do u look like?
<Banana_Cream_Pie> blonde hair
<Banana_Cream_Pie> nice body
<Banana_Cream_Pie> great dick
<PaRaMoRe> great dick?
<Banana_Cream_Pie> yeah
<Banana_Cream_Pie> im a hermaphrodite
<PaRaMoRe> ur a weirdo thats what u are
<Banana_Cream_Pie> D:
<Banana_Cream_Pie> thats not nice

[AndyIsIndo]

liar Xd ur not blood ninja.

[Jello]

Maybe read the thread before posting? That can usually clear things up.

[Windows32k]

what site is that on?

[Vanity]

Originally Posted by Windows32k

what site is that on?

www.omegle.com i think, i'm not sure

[Nachos]

i r banana cream pie (this is me)



<Banana_Cream_Pie> hey
<Banana_Cream_Pie> wanna rp? i got roles
<RPgirl4guy> sure
<Banana_Cream_Pie> here's the roles
<Banana_Cream_Pie> im pizza guy delivering your pizza while you're
showering
<Banana_Cream_Pie> rdy?
<Banana_Cream_Pie> ???
<RPgirl4guy> sure
<Banana_Cream_Pie> kk
<Banana_Cream_Pie> i finally arive to your house with your pizza
<Banana_Cream_Pie> i ring the door and you tell me to come in from the
shower
<Banana_Cream_Pie> i set down the pizza and wait for you
<Banana_Cream_Pie> as i wait i light a cigarette
<Banana_Cream_Pie> i start to smoke it
<Banana_Cream_Pie> i ask waht are you doing
<Banana_Cream_Pie> what are you doing up there?
<RPgirl4guy> i come downstairs with a towel wrapped around and hand
you the money
<Banana_Cream_Pie> and i drool
<Banana_Cream_Pie> i remember i left my front door open and go oh
shit!
<Banana_Cream_Pie> i drop my cigarette
<Banana_Cream_Pie> and push you down and break ur leg
<Banana_Cream_Pie> and i lock the door and say bye
<Banana_Cream_Pie> i drive away ad your house burns down
<Banana_Cream_Pie> i can hear you moaning
<Banana_Cream_Pie> and i assume it's because of the pizza and say
"another satisfied customer"
<Banana_Cream_Pie> i call your house and you dont answer
<Banana_Cream_Pie> i come back
<Banana_Cream_Pie> and open the door
<Banana_Cream_Pie> and asy "oh shit!"
<Banana_Cream_Pie> and i pour pop on you when i thought it was water"
<Banana_Cream_Pie> and you die
<Banana_Cream_Pie> wasn't that a fun rp?

[Vanity]

Originally Posted by Hate

i r banana cream pie (this is me)



<Banana_Cream_Pie> hey
<Banana_Cream_Pie> wanna rp? i got roles
<RPgirl4guy> sure
<Banana_Cream_Pie> here's the roles
<Banana_Cream_Pie> im pizza guy delivering your pizza while you're
showering
<Banana_Cream_Pie> rdy?
<Banana_Cream_Pie> ???
<RPgirl4guy> sure
<Banana_Cream_Pie> kk
<Banana_Cream_Pie> i finally arive to your house with your pizza
<Banana_Cream_Pie> i ring the door and you tell me to come in from the
shower
<Banana_Cream_Pie> i set down the pizza and wait for you
<Banana_Cream_Pie> as i wait i light a cigarette
<Banana_Cream_Pie> i start to smoke it
<Banana_Cream_Pie> i ask waht are you doing
<Banana_Cream_Pie> what are you doing up there?
<RPgirl4guy> i come downstairs with a towel wrapped around and hand
you the money
<Banana_Cream_Pie> and i drool
<Banana_Cream_Pie> i remember i left my front door open and go oh
shit!
<Banana_Cream_Pie> i drop my cigarette
<Banana_Cream_Pie> and push you down and break ur leg
<Banana_Cream_Pie> and i lock the door and say bye
<Banana_Cream_Pie> i drive away ad your house burns down
<Banana_Cream_Pie> i can hear you moaning
<Banana_Cream_Pie> and i assume it's because of the pizza and say
"another satisfied customer"
<Banana_Cream_Pie> i call your house and you dont answer
<Banana_Cream_Pie> i come back
<Banana_Cream_Pie> and open the door
<Banana_Cream_Pie> and asy "oh shit!"
<Banana_Cream_Pie> and i pour pop on you when i thought it was water"
<Banana_Cream_Pie> and you die
<Banana_Cream_Pie> wasn't that a fun rp?

lmao. another satisfied customer lol